Grand Canyon

you have me
like you always do
when you sit back
relaxed
cool
so cool
and there is nothing
that i can do
to overcome your grasp
i tried
it almost broke me
i had to fall
out of love with you
in hopes that it would cure me 
but i couldn’t
that’s the thing
if you only knew
how surreal it all is for me
and now i’m back
where i started
scares the hell out of me
but then again
not really
because it was torturous
living without you
i carried you with me
almost everywhere i went
you were always with me
i swear it’s true
there is nothing that i wouldn’t do 
just to spend time with you
and this is a simple rhyme
surely not worthy of you
but then again
that’s never mattered to you
we each built empires
but yours was impenetrable
and mine was just a fantasy
a poet‘s realm
and it’s a lonely place
living here without you
that’s just the truth
i swim and swim and swim
but the current gets the best of me 
and the critics will line up
to try and understand our lines
but they’ll never see through
what we have inside
you were kissed
and so was i
it was never just you
under that poetic tree
you folded me like origami
and flicked me across the table
into the illustrated desert
where i stand sometimes
arms folded
waiting for you or for a hearse
and i’d be happy to see either
because this has got to be the worst 
i’ve felt in decades
i stutter and hope to find reprieve 
here in my silent little lonely world 
where the waves have overthrown me 
and i swear the water i’m drowning in 
it could fill up the grand canyon